It Starts Today

All of the unhappy people will start lining up outside the office this morning to tell the grievance committee member how unhappy they are with the contract. How do I know? Because he's also my coworker and the same people were unhappy with the last contract too.

I will know this contract inside and out before the three years are up on it. I'll be able to answer questions left and right because I'll know the agreement better than probably Johnny Friendly that negotiated it in the first place. I'm not a shop steward but by golly I'll know it as well as they should. My coworker and I talk about the situations that arise and there are lots of them. Mostly it's easy to solve. For the most part it's about not being late to work and that their supervisor is picking on them because they punched in two minutes late....every day.

Yeah, that's a common one actually. And because I know the agreement and my coworker knows it and for some reason the supervisor fails to read it and understand it then there is always a loophole in how they try to give the employee a letter. Always. They never follow procedures correctly. What was a slam dunk turns into the supervisor having egg on his face.

Usually the employee is at fault too, that's the thing! They usually deserve the letter or even being terminated because they are lazy, screwups, never come to work and are out of leave, or they just don't care and would rather be somewhere else. However because the supervisor makes a mistake 95% of the time they keep their job, aren't grateful they get out of trouble, and will continue to go about their ways as if nothing happened. Until they get in trouble again.

Yeah, all of that begins today and you know something? I'm glad because the alternative would have been me standing in a ditch again. I'm not standing in that ditch again. I'll listen to the malcontents talk about how they hate the deal but didn't vote on it, they were busy doing whatever else they were doing that kept them from spending a half hour and listening to the negotiating team explain everything. I'll listen to the malcontents talk about how bad their jobs are despite being paid very well. I'll listen to the malcontents and wonder what in the world they would do when they had to go apply at Walmart and deal with managers I dealt with that thought I was an imbecile and spoke to me as they would a third grader. All the while thinking, actually knowing I made more than they did and had been in the workforce much longer than they had.

Yeah that magic starts today. The phone will be ringing before I'm even unable to unlock the office door. I know it will be and I'll answer it, and I'll tell them to come on down with their questions because I'm happy that I'm able to go to work today and not stand in a ditch.