Captain Insaneo Buys A Harley....Sort Of

As funny as MST3K is to me it is nothing compared to Captain Insaneo's latest escapade. Since last Fall he has done nothing except talk about buying a brand new Harley Sportster. I mean NOTHING but talk about it....every night the same thing....endless stories about it.

So finally early this year he ordered it and it had a three month wait. So in the mean time (he hates waiting and makes many visits to the dealership which is at least seventy miles away for t-shirts and hats) he talked his son, Junior Insaneo, who hasn't ridden a motorcycle and didn't have a license and only a part time job into buying one as well.

This is a seven thousand dollar plus bike. Well only having a part time job he didn't qualify so his girlfriend stepped up to the plate, got approved, and signed the papers.

Captain Insaneo had to ride it home since Junior didn't have a license and no experience on a bike as I stated. So they bring it home that afternoon. The Captain comes to work with pictures of Junior Insaneo sitting on the bike, pictures of The Captain sitting on the bike, and pictures of Junior video taping the bike sitting by itself, yes I tell you the truth.

So while Captain Insaneo is at work, Junior decides to take his brand new bike out on the street and practice, he only lays the brand new bike over three times before deciding he doesn't have enough experience to ride it.

That weekend Captain Insaneo decides that Junior probably doesn't have the skills yet so he takes an old Honda and takes it and Junior to a big parking lot to practice. A couple of hours later Junior decides he can probably handle the bigger bike so they retrieve it and he practices. They get out on a busy street with The Captain on the back and Junior nearly dumps them both off of the bike and almost crashes it which prompted the decision to trade the brand new bike, his girlfriend's car, and some cash for a 1999 Jeep Cherokee that needed the heater core replaced.

So almost a month later Captain Insaneo's brand new bike arrives at the dealership and The Captain can talk of nothing else but his bike while being VERY quiet about his son's bike. That story was relayed to another co-worker by the son directly.

So The Captain picks up his bike and rides it back home while ordering two thousand dollars worth of accessories to go with it. This was about two weeks ago and we get non stop pictures of the bike with nearly every family member sitting on the bike from every angle possible. Monday he tells us that the forks keep on bottoming out when he goes over small bumps in the road and he needs to put some heavier fork oil in them to prevent this as per the recommended fix of the dealership.

They will do it but of course it will cost a lot....so this leads to the logical choice....you guessed it, he is going to take it to the same car lot and put it for sale and buy a much bigger bike.

An eighteen thousand dollar bike. It seems that the dealership doesn't take trade ins at all but are only too happy to sell him the bigger bike and have placed his name on said bike.